Welcome to Facebook!
by laughs I moved to a new thing
Summary: I think the title pretty much explains it all. Rated T for language and some very mild sexual themes. Includes my OC but it is all explained in the opening Author's Note. Almost all characters are eventually included. PLEASE READ CHAPTER 3.
1. May 14

**What's this? A brand new story that I probably shouldn't upload but did anyway? Yep, that's what it looks like. This is my first (uploaded) Hetalia fanfic, as well as my first Facebook!fic, so please be kind. Also, if the formatting is too difficult for you to read, let me know and I'll try to fix it. I sort of used another Facebook!fic from the Hetalia fandom and one for the Vocaloid fandom as a guide of sorts for the Facebook formatting, as well as the actual site itself.**

**Also, as a quick note, Kana is my OC. She doesn't really represent any sort of country, but more like Harajuku, Japan, or Hokkaido, Japan, hence the reason she shares Kiku's surname. I know that she should probably be Japan's daughter, but I'm writing another story that kind of centers around her, so I figured why confuse myself or any future readers?  
><strong>

**Ignore any grammar/spelling mistakes. Those are on purpose. Nobody checks those things on Facebook or while they're texting. XD**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>Saturday, May 14<p>

**Kana Honda** can't wait till **Alfred F Jones** gets his butt over here to pick me up for our date. Hurry, Alfred!  
><em>43 minutes ago • Comment • Like<em>

**Alfred F Jones** im comin! it's matt's fault, anyway.  
><em>41 ago via Facebook mobile • Like<br>_ **Kana Honda** Well then what is Matthew doing that doesn't let you leave for the planned date that he knows you have to go to?  
><em>37 minutes ago • Like<em>  
><strong>Matthew Williams<strong> I'm not doing anything. I'm sitting at the computer in my room. Alfred's not even here, I think he's downstairs in the living room. I'll check.  
><em>36 minutes ago • Like<br>_ **Kana Honda** Thanks, Matt  
><em>36 minutes ago • Like<em>  
><strong>Alfred F Jones<strong> no!1  
><em>36 minutes ago via Facebook mobile • Like<em>  
><strong>Alfred F Jones <strong>fuck  
><em>33 minutes ago via Facebook mobile • Like<em>  
><strong>Matthew Williams<strong> Yep, he's watching The Price is Right. Some lady just won a car. And I think he's drooling.  
><em>31 minutes ago • Like<em>  
><strong>Kana Honda<strong> Damn it, Alfred, if you don't get your butt over here, I'm coming over there and it won't be pretty! And why are you drooling over some lady? It's cuz she's older, isn't it?  
><em>30 minutes ago • Like<em>  
><strong>Alfred F Jones<strong> I swear, that was just water  
><em>26 minutes ago via Facebook mobile • Like (<em>**Francis Bonnefois **_likes this)_

* * *

><p><strong>Kana Honda<strong> Finally, Alfred's here! I'm willing to overlook the drooling—this time only.  
><em>20 minutes ago • Comment • Like<br>_**Matthew Williams**_, _**Francis Bonnefois**_, and _**2 others**_ like this._

**Francis Bonnefois** Ah, love is a powerful thing, non? ;) _  
>19 minutes ago • Like<br>_**Kana Honda** Ugh, go away you perv!  
><em>17 minutes ago via Facebook mobile • Like (<em>**Arthur Kirkland **_and _**72 others**_ like this)  
><em>**Francis Bonnefois** Mon dieu! Surely I am not such a "pervert" that all seventy-two of you "like"d that comment?  
><em>About 17 minutes ago • Like<em>  
><strong>Elizaveta Héderváry<strong> 73, counting arthur (no i didnt like it ;D)  
><em>16 minutes ago • Like<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew Williams<strong> is happy to have the house to myself now =)  
><em>11 minutes ago • Comment • Like<br>_**Gilbert Beilschmidt **_likes this._

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** so does this mean u want the awesome me to come over? ;D  
><em>8 minutes ago • Like (<em>**Elizaveta Héderváry** _likes this)  
><em>**Matthew Williams** No! That's okay. I-I'll be fine.  
><em>7 minutes ago • Like<br>_**Gilbert Beilschmidt** to l8 ;) im on my way now  
><em>About 3 minutes ago<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew Williams<strong> now suddenly I wish Alfred was here to help! Ow! Maple hockey…Go away, Gilbert!  
><em>Seconds ago • Comment • Like<br>_**Roderich Edelstein** _likes this._

* * *

><p><em>1:05 p.m.<em>

_To: Kana Honda_

_From: Kiku Honda_

Konnichiwa. What are you doing?

.

.

.

_1:05 p.m._

_To: Kiku Honda_

_From: Kana Honda_

im on my d8 w/ alfred! Wher wer u? We left a whil ago n I didnt c u

.

.

.

_1:08 p.m._

_To: Kana Honda_

_From: Kiku Honda_

Oh I was doing something with a friend

.

.

.

_1:09 p.m._

_To: Kiku Honda_

_From: Kana Honda_

Wat? W/ who? Was it hercales?

.

.

.

_1:10 p.m._

_To: Kana Honda_

_From: Kiku Honda_

o.o no. Now why are you texting me if you're on a date with Alfred?

.

.

.

_1:11 p.m._

_To: Kiku Honda_

_From: Kana Honda_

Hes in the bathroom but hes comin so bye!

.

* * *

><p><strong>Ah, spell check hates me already XD<strong>

**Well, there ya go. I know it's not that long, but I'm gonna try to make it longer with later chapters.  
><strong>

**Anyway, I don't know about a regular updating schedule for this. It's kind of just something random for me to work on when I have writer's block or no inspiration. **

**[[EDIT]] I'm going to try to upload every Wednesday or Thursday. I haven't decided yet. At first, I thought I was going to upload every Monday, then the next chapter wasn't finished, so then I said Tuesday, and it wasn't done, so now it's Wednesday. Don't be mad if I don't upload it today, I'll try to upload it tomorrow. If not, wait until next week, and…I have no idea. I'll upload later today (Wednesday) or tomorrow. [[/EDIT]]**

**Review!**

**I don't own Hetalia, Facebook, or a working phone (at the moment; it's out of airtime, damn crappy ass Net10 phones), but I do own Kana!  
><strong>


	2. May 15

Sunday, May 15

* * *

><p><strong>Antonio Fernandez Carriedo<strong>_ just joined Facebook!  
>About 6 hours ago • Comment • Like<em>

**Lovino "Romano" Vargas** oh fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. My safe haven has been infiltrated by the damn tomato bastard!  
><em>About 6 hours ago • Like<br>_**Antonio Fernandez Carriedo** Lovi, you're so mean to me! Anyway, can you help me? I can't figure out this site for the life of me. Show me how I would send a friend request, and how I would accept it…  
><em>About 6 hours ago • Like<em>  
><strong>Lovino "Romano" Vargas<strong> you fucking idiot. You can't comment on someone's status without already being their friend. And I swear I never accepted you  
><em>About 6 hours ago • Like<em>  
><strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong> Big brother Antonio~  
><em>About 6 hours ago • Like<br>_ **Lovino "Romano" Vargas** oh why didn't I see that coming?  
><em>About 6 hours ago • Like<br>_**Kana Honda** 'Cuz you suck? :)  
><em>About 6 hours ago • Like (<em>**Francis Bonnefois**_ and __**3 others**__ like this)  
><em>**Elizaveta Héderváry** Yes he does, Kana. Yes he does. ;)  
><em>About 5 hours ago • Like (<em>**Kana Honda**_ likes this)  
><em>**Lovino "Romano" Vargas** why can't you two be insane yaoi fangirls on a site where I'm NOT a member?  
><em>About 5 hours ago • Like<br>_**Elizaveta Héderváry** Because you know you love us ;D  
><em>About 5 hours ago • Like (<em>**Kana Honda**_ likes this)__  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>Alfred F Jones<strong> damn u isaac newton!1  
><em>About 4 hours ago via Facebook Mobile • Comment • Like<em>

**Arthur Kirkland** Do you mean to say that you are not understanding the science homework?  
><em>About 4 hours ago • Like (<em>**Ludwig Beilschmidt **_likes this)  
><em>**Alfred F Jones** yes! its 2 hard. can I borrow ur notes l8r  
><em>About 4 hours ago via Facebook Mobile • Like<br>_**Arthur Kirkland** No. Although, if you need help with your English, I wouldn't mind. It seems you need the help very much.  
><em>About 4 hours ago • Like (<em>**Kiku Honda**_ likes this)  
><em>**Alfred F Jones** you suck u no that  
><em>About 4 hours ago via Facebook Mobile • Like (<em>**Francis Bonnefois **_likes this)  
><em>**Francis Bonnefois** I think he knows very well. ;)  
><em>About 4 hours ago • Like<br>_**Alfred F Jones** well ya i only tell him…oh ewwww!  
><em>About 4 hours ago via Facebook Mobile • Like<br>_**Arthur Kirkland** Please, Francis. Keep our private life private.  
><em>About 4 hours ago • Like<br>_**Kana Honda** Notice how he doesn't deny it ;D  
><em>About 4 hours ago • Like (<em>**Francis Bonnefois **_and _**3 others**_ like this)_

* * *

><p><strong>Antonio Fernandez Carriedo<strong>_ likes_** Tomatoes**_, _**Spanish Music**_, and _**4 others**_.  
>About 4 hours ago • Comment • Like<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Matthew Williams<strong> Staying with **Alfred F Jones** tonight. He forced me to watch this show, Survivor, and now I'm hooked. Who else is watching?  
><em>About 20 minutes ago • Comment • Like<em>

**Arthur Kirkland** Now who on Earth would watch something as time-wasting as that?  
><em>18 minutes ago • Like<br>_**Alfred F Jones** come on dude the shows awesome ill make u watch it nxt seasin  
><em>17 minutes ago via Facebook Mobile • Like<br>_**Matthew Williams **Come on, guys, don't fight.  
><em>15 minutes ago • Like (<em>**Kana Honda**_ likes this)  
><em>**Kana Honda** yeah guys, chill. It's a show. Alfred, Artie loves that show Dr Who. He raves about it, even, but you don't care that much, right?  
><em>15 minutes ago • Like (<em>**Matthew Williams**_ likes this)_

* * *

><p>.<p>

.

.

_**11:19 p.m.  
>To: <strong>Matthew Williams  
><strong>From: <strong>Alfred F Jones_

Wasnt da survivor reunion show awesome?

.

.

.

_**11:20 p.m.**  
><strong>To: <strong>Alfred F Jones  
><strong>From: <strong>Matthew Williams_

Yep. Im definitely hooked. Cant wait for next season

_._

_._

_._

_**11:23 p.m.  
>To: <strong>Matthew Williams  
><strong>From:<strong> Alfred F Jones_

Ur boring. Im checking facebook 4 less boring ppl. Lemme on da laptop

.

.

.

* * *

><p>I changed the texting format a little, to make it look better. I'll go back and fix the first chapter later.<p>

Short chapter again. Sorry. I'll try to make the next one longer.

Yes, I know, late update. I don't have Internet at home so I have to come to school to upload, and it sucks. Anyway, in case you didn't get my message last chapter, I'm going to try to update every Wednesday or Thursday. This is my first attempt at a regular update schedule, but I think it'll help me with my procrastination…speaking of, I have a social studies paper I need to write…

Anywho, on to my excuses! I've been sick for the past few days, since about Tuesday or Wednesday, so I haven't been able to upload anything. I'll try to be better for next week! Yes, I'm still sick, but I've been getting better with resting at home~ It was just nice to be able to get out of bed for a while.

Thanks to **xXRomanoXx** for reviewing, and the suggestion of adding Antonio and Lovi into this chapter! I was planning on adding the characters in slowly, but I didn't know who to add in this chapter. And by add, I mean with an actual status or comment, rather than just a "like" or something.

Also, thanks to **LiveEatBreathRepeat** for reviewing!

Remember—reviewers get extra brownie points with me! And brownies are good, da? :)

…Long author's note is long…


	3. IMPORTANT AN PLEASE READ

Aye, dios mio…I'd like to apologize in advance for this long author's note, but there will be no real chapter to this story. Actually, that's what I'm going to be talking about right now.

This story started out as a set-up for a chapter!fic that I was going to write, staring Alfred and Kana, my OC. That won't be happening. In fact, I was beginning to think up a plot in which I would be getting rid of Kana from this story. She was going to be transferred into a school on the other side of the world for something, but then I thought, she's so Mary-Sue already…and all the characters are pretty OOC…why not just rewrite this entire thing?

And there is my purpose for this. All those who actually liked Kana, though I don't know if there were many, I do apologize, but I've come to a realization that OCs for Hetalia just aren't my forte. I make OCs for everything else, but Hetalia!OCs, for me, other than countries, just don't work. Yes, I've created personas for Barbados, India, Ireland, Israel, and the Philippines, but they're countries, not cities (like Kana, who actually didn't represent anything until like chapter 3 or 4 of this was written, I think; originally, she was going to be for an AU AlfredXOC story that I don't think'll be written). Anyway, I'm just letting anyone who reads this that I am going to be writing a canon-only Facebook!fic with the chapters that I have that were supposed to be written for this story, but, well, y'know. And the new Facebook!fic that I write, I dunno what I'm gonna call it. Probably some song name or something, or maybe **Welcome to Facebook** like this one. I dunno.

Salut, mes amis! Guten nacht!

Oh, shameless self-advertisement (times two!)

First: Go read **Dusk, Eh** by me. It's my Twilight parody and it's fucking awesome despite Prussia only showing up a couple times in the first two chapters. It's moving really quickly, but it's the awesomest fucking thing I think I've ever written. :D Canada's a little OOC, but he's based off my Facebook!RP Canada so it's all good. ^^

Which brings me to my second: I RP on Facebook for Canada (and Hungary, too, for that matter. Yeah yeah, shut up), and am lonely with no one to RP _with_. If a lovely Hetalia-other-than-Canada-or-Hungary RPer would be so kind and want to RP with me, send me a PM and I'll give you the e-mail I use to make their RP profiles.

Isten!

_**Translations (because even in my author's notes I use some sort of foreign language):**_

"Dios mio" Spanish—"My god"  
>"Salut, mes amis!" French—"Goodbye, my friends!"<br>"Guten nacht!" German—"Goodnight!" 'Cuz I dunno if it's night where you're at while you're reading this, but for me, it's nearly eight at night. And I probably spelled that wrong, or forgot an umlaut, but I'm too lazy to add it in right now. :P  
>"Isten!" Hungarian—"Goodbye!" I think XP<p> 


End file.
